Embracing the Pride of Fatherhood

Photo courtesy of Maura Dawn Photography.

Tonight I had a bit of an epiphany after having dinner with friends who are in a bit of a similar situation. 

You see, I recently made a list of goals for myself and undoubtedly being a "good dad" was at the VERY top of that list.

So why am I embarrassed to admit in a social setting that staying home with my son is a role that I've embraced?  Because I haven't embraced it.   

It's funny because I'd rather brag about the work I'm juggling in between naps or at night while Boone is asleep, and less proud of the fact that most of my day is filled with 100% one on one quality time with my son. 

Fact 1:  my wife is a driven woman with her dream job and a steady income. 
Fact 2:  I am capable of getting a job that would easily supplement our income and ultimately support our family.

Fact 3:  I'm blessed to know what it means to spend countless hours with a kid that I adore more than anything on the face of this earth who is a sponge and clings to my every word and emotion.

It's as if I've finally realized that many (in face MOST) fathers simply don't have this opportunity.  It's two-fold because it requires me embracing a role that's not deemed natural STILL in the society we live in and it also requires an understanding that my wife is indeed the breadwinner in our household.... both tough pills to swallow.

I feel like I need to infuse some sort of statement about this first quarter being the most profitable I've experienced, ever.  Call it insecurity, pride, or merely my competitive spirit, but it's as if the TOP goal on my list quickly dropped for some odd reason.

The fact of the matter is, I should be less proud of my fiscal contribution and embrace the idea that I am "providing" for my family in a way that is much more valuable than any amount of money could ever be worth.

I don't judge working mothers or envy fathers who provide for there families. I HIGHLY respect single parents and parents who manage to raise multiple children.  I had NO EARTHLY IDEA how hard it was to raise a kid until I became a parent myself.  Mom, Dad, I sure do love ya.  In fact, I have a whole new appreciation for anyone who spends day in and day out working with children (teachers seriously have a special place in heaven). 

Anyways, quite frankly I'm happy, my wife and son are happy and healthy, so what more could a guy ask for?

I don't know how long I will have the opportunity to be a "stay at home dad", so I think from this day forward, I'll choose to embrace what it is, be thankful for the special time together, and enjoy every minute of it ... with pride.

Designing and diving for a greater purpose

A friend of mine sent me this story and I couldn't be more thrilled to share it.

Gregory Kloehn is a man after my own heart.  As a fellow designer, craftsman, artist, and dumpster diver I can't think of a better way to use your God given talents to help others and quite frankly I'm jealous I didn't come up with the idea myself!

Everyday in NYC I see GORGEOUS things, a multitude of raw materials, and items that deserve a new life headed to the landfill.  Gregory Kloehn has found probably the most novel trash to treasure solution I have ever seen... and that's not even the silver lining.

This Oakland based artist dumpster dives and uses a plethora of different materials to build homes for the homeless.  Genius.

Here are some pics of a few of my favorite shots:

Anyone can design a space with millions of dollars and a team of 20, but it takes a much more creative and skilled craftsman to use what's available and design/build around it.  

You can see the entire article here.  

Think outside of the box today and do something out of the ordinary to help someone.

Dad

As year 7 (although it seems like yesterday) approaches since my dad, Rick Faires, went to be with the Lord, I can’t help but reflect as I am slowly learning the blessings and trials of becoming a father myself.  A love I never knew, a responsibility I never felt, a new passion for life and a yearning in my heart to do everything in my power to bring a smile to my boy’s face. 

The concept of leaving a legacy means many different things to different people.  To me, it lies in the simplest of things in life. The moments when I find myself “doing what my father did” without even thinking about it and realizing later that I had a pretty good teacher.  I’m not saying I’m a perfect Dad, I’m far from it.  My Dad wasn’t perfect either, and he was pretty transparent with us about that.  But, for the most part I’m blessed by his unfailing example of love.  Dad had a way of letting us know how much he cared about us, most of the time without saying anything at all. 

Dad, the shoes you left me to fill are still too big, thank you for that.  I used to be sad thinking about how my children wouldn’t get to “know who you are”.  Now I realize that they know you much deeper than I ever expected.  I guess I couldn’t grasp how this “dad” and “family” thing really worked until I heard that first cry.   My new understanding is that they feel your love everyday and they will continue to feel it until I join you in clouds, and then they’ll pass that same love along.

Miss you daily, but also feel you right here by my side, daily.